7/4/11 - 7/4/12: The Year of the Beard

Ok, so I used to blog CONSTANTLY when myspace was a thing, but since the migration to Facebook, I haven't really had a reason to blog anything. I used to give updates on my comedy career, what I was doing, etc. I haven't really had much to update since the move to LA in 2009, so I haven't really blogged much. I've been working on screenwriting, wrote a book, and have been working on my 2nd comedy cd (which for some reason continues to elude me each time we try to record it), and my day job has kept me plenty busy.

Yesterday, I made a mistake I haven't made in 5 years....

Most of you that know me know that I usually look like this:

Now, this is a look that I have generally sported for the last 5 years. 5 years is a pinnacle in this blog, because that was the last time I made this terrible mistake.

5 years ago, when my life-time best friend Sean was visiting from my native Philadelphia (I then lived in Minneapolis), I had slipped on a wet faucet while trimming with a clippers and took a huge chunk out of my goatee. I had already had a shaved head, so the result was me looking like some sort of chemo-therapy patient. It was not good.

I have often been restless with the taming of my beard of the years. I trim to frequently, and can never seem to keep things symmetrical (which I obsess over).

Yesterday, I bonsai tree'd my way to the point of no return....


Here was the result:

As you can see, having a beard is a critical component in hiding the fact that my face has ZERO definition. My close friend and comedian Patrick Melton best described me as having a "Simpson's" face.

Combine the fact that I'm probably 50 pounds overweight (easily), and have the starting point facial definition of a sea turtle, this couldn't have ended any other way then bad.

I made a decision yesterday though.

In an effort to fight my compulsion to trim, cut, and shape my facial hair, I made a pact with myself that yesterday (July 4th, 2011) would be the LAST day I touched my facial hair for 12 months. I will let the beard grow out, attempt to tame it along the way (I do have a corporate day job) but will make no efforts to reduce the growth.

I will update you readers weekly with pictures of my beard-volution, as well as any stories I may have that coincide with the embarrassment that is my current appearance.

Stay tuned...